Your Racist Friend

Election anxiety is in full force and sleep is impossible. I know, I know.

But.

Also.

The temperatures is perfect right now. The leaves are crunching. In our house at least, we seem to have made it past that really gnarly stage of month seven fatigue. I find myself laughing more.

Everyone keeps talking about how they can’t wait to get the election behind us, or 2020, or however long this pandemic will be here. I can’t quite bring myself to wish a second of it away. Every moment is a gift, even the really shitty ones. And I want as many of those moments as I can get, dammit.

We watched a surprisingly perfect movie last night – International Falls. It was delightfully tender and vulnerable study of comedy. At one point, one of the characters is talking about being with her mother as she passed and says, “It was so beautiful. And I thought…maybe this was it. This was it. And I wasn’t sad. I was grateful. I remember thinking this was enough. That to expect anything more would be greedy.”

And as the leaves crinkle under the feet of my running and laughing children, I feel so very grateful. I don’t need to see their faces to know they are smiling as they dash across the empty streets, rushing back to the house to resume distance learning.

I’m not saying I don’t want change. I will stand beside you and fight for that change, dammit. But I’m not going to wish away this time. I’m going to be grateful for it. Because this is it. This has to be enough.

Now on a less sentimental note, this week’s Ukulele Friday is a song that’s been stuck in my head. For four years. A little They Might Be Giants to close out your week. And just in case you were thinking of sitting this one out, VOTE, DAMMIT.


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