Unicorns Get Stabby, Too

I’m having a day.  This kind of day*:

I blame my mortgage company.  The story isn’t very good, so I’m not going to tell it to you.  But seeing as how I have to go make a happy ending (oh shut it you pervs), I suddenly don’t have time to tell you that I recently discovered they make Spanx for men.  And they don’t call them Manx.  Frankly I can’t decide which of those facts is more appalling.

I did have time to write a Sprocket Piece though. Poor (and by “poor” I really mean “ridiculously wealthy and revered so don’t feel THAT bad for her”) Julie Taymor and the Spider-Man musical are getting trashed in an entirely new musical.  Yay for catty, creative people!

*Thanks for the most perfect graphic ever, Deb!

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  1. I wish I had a horn on top my head so I could stab people with it. You wouldn’t even have to smuggle it through customs because its an appendage!! Damn Unicorns. They have all the fun.


  2. Glad you like the graphic! When I read your blog post title, I thought it said “Unicorns get shabby, too.” WTF? Maybe they also need their own brand of Spanx.

    P.S. I hope your day improves.

  3. i like men a bit more rugged looking or commando. just saying.

    need me make those mortgage bitches cry? cuz i will if they fuck with my elly, rocco, and baby buggin.

  4. I remember that scene from “When Mythical Creatures Attack!” It’s the same episode where Rod Stewart was impregnated by a school of time-travelling Sea Monkeys.

    Best. Episode. EVA!

  5. In an unrelated story I found spanx for my dog. The one that’s still alive.
    Also, that’s a robot unicorn. No genuine mythical creature impales innocent bystanders. Except, of course, the minotaur. But he’s got his reasons and you shouldn’t have been in is underground labyrinth anyway.

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