Since it’s a “family” holiday and all that jazz, I thought I’d try and not curse in this post. Seeing as how that’s like asking me to not breathe, I obviously can’t do it for very long. So I’m stealing someone else’s post.
It’s lovely, and thoughtful, and appropriate in my mind. She also put her spin on Twas the Night Before Christmas, but no Parental Advisory is necessary. I found it on a Breast Cancer Survivor’s blog, so go give her some love, too.
Don’t panic. I’ll be back with the usual inappropriate posts after Christmas. I am positively dripping with restraint this week, I tell ya.
Running out of air…must….post…before…expletives…explode…ughhhhh!
T’was the night before chemo, when all through the room
Not a patient was stirring, from Ativan I presume
The chemo bags were hung on IV poles with care
In hopes that a cure soon would be there
The patients were nestled all snug in their lounge chairs
Sipping Ensure and hugging Relay teddy bears
And the nurse in her scrubs and I in my wig
Had just settled down for another chemo gig
When out in the parking lot there arose such a clatter
I sprang from my chair to see what was the matter
Away to the window I flew like a flash
Tore open the blinds and threw up on the glass
Soothing my nausea with the fresh cool breeze
The wind took my wig and it flew with such ease
When what to my wondering eyes did I see?
Eight tiny nurses giggling with glee
Leading the pack was an oncologist so sweet
With a mission of cancer that they would beat
To help with side effects from chemo we blame
Was his arsenal of drugs that he shouted by name
“Now Xanax!, now Ativan!, now Zofran! and Compazine!
Let’s offer comfort with bonbons and magazines
On Vicodin!, on Darvocet!, on Tylenol! And morphine!
Let’s make them loopy and make a big scene!”
To the top of Mt. Courage, to the top of Mt. Hope
Now dash away, dash away so we can help cope
With tumors and lesions and lumps it is clear
We must make their cancer finally disappear!
So up to the clinic-top, they flew and flew
With a sleigh full of drugs and the doctor too
Then with a jingling I heard from their purse
Was the prancing and pawing of each little nurse
As I drew in my head and was turning around
In through the vent the doctor came with a bound
His eyes how they twinkled – his dimples so merry
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry
He was dressed all in white with an ugly plaid tie
He preached to the patients, “Do not ask why”
Have courage, choose hope and just think positive
Live, love and laugh and your life will be lucrative
Never forget that you are heroes in my book
Conquering cancer without a second look
With a wink of his eye and a twist of his head
He soon let me know I had nothing to dread
A bundle of drugs he had flung on his back
He looked like a drug dealer opening his pack
He spoke not a word but went straight to work
Making me feel sick, so I called him a jerk
A human pin cushion, I had become
So multiple pokes, again I succumb
But then I remembered, my life he was saving
So I realized I better start really behaving
“What comes around goes around” I always say
And a bad attitude might haunt me one day
I thanked him for fighting with me side by side
With two against one, cancer cannot hide
Then laying his finger aside of his nose
And giving a nod, up the vent he rose
He sprang to his sleigh, gave the nurses a sign
To travel the world fighting cancer like mine
The sleigh was our hope and he was the driver
Bringing strength and good cheer to every survivor
I heard him exclaim as he flew out of sight
Happy Holidays to all and to all a good night!
(as posted at Caroline’s Breast Cancer Blog)