- Mom tried to teach me crochet once. We DID NOT make these. — Forest Gump Meets Pulp Fiction http://bit.ly/cshX4y @craftastrophe #
- Some days you gotta go ahead and spill the entire cup of tea on the sofa so you can see just how much it will absorb. *sigh* #
- Mildred managed to snag a stitch and decided to recreate a scene from The Shining. Don't worry. She's fine. My couch, not so much. #
- I wanna know what love is. #
- Never quote random 80's lyrics at your little brother unless your ready for it to turn into commentary on your mother's lady bits. #
- Also never update from your cell phone while getting slapped by a sibling. #GrammarIsHardBarbie #
- I'm pretty sure this makes me famous. Ish. Thanks, @HippestSnippets. RT The hippest hump day of the week! http://bit.ly/bcvsNt #
- If you missed the best video in the history of all time, I'm posting it AGAIN. It will make you #FURIOUSLYHAPPY http://wp.me/pueVq-1pG #
- My fire alarm is LOUD. If you're keeping count, that makes TWO kitchen fires today. Will someone please take me out for dinner? #
- I'm declaring this my official theme song for the day. Ihttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wmin5WkOuPw #
- I vacuumed up the ashes, opened all the windows, and found the fire extinguisher. Time to try turning on the oven again… #
- …and they day starts out strong with surprise free tix to see Patrick Stewart on Broadway! Wonder if I'll get a chance to lick Jean Luc. #
- Happy Birthday to me. http://twitpic.com/2w4mm3 #
Wow! That week had everything! Crocheted gimps, cone kitty and a bloody couch, Foreigner, sibling slapping, a diss on Barbie, fame, the best video ever, a crescendo of kitchen fires, Patrick Stewart AND a birthday!
I would have called it a week after the crocheted gimps! But then I can think of nothing that creeps me out more so…
Hope you had a crazy good birthday!
That’s probably why I’m so effing tired, eh?
How did your birthday slip past me?!?! Sending you happy spankings.
What a coincidence! My sofa likes tea tests too.
I now can’t get my Mom’s lady bits outta my head.
your tweets always make me want to tweet more, and then I remember how scary and overwhelming twitter is. it gives me panic attacks.
I just pretend I use twitter because all the cool kids are doing it.
“Also never update from your cell phone while getting slapped by a sibling.” Classic!! LMAO!!!!
Comments are closed.