- This is what my teeth feel like after eating spinach. RT I Sure Hope There Isn’t Any Fungus Involved http://bit.ly/dgF0hZ @craftastrophe #
- It's almost noon and not one single person has handed me a unicorn or a cocktail today. Reality sucks. #
- RT @craftastrophe Sorry, Bugs http://bit.ly/aeHObj – Quite possibly the most horrifying craftastrophe of all time. #
- Dear PMS, no we can't have potato chips and french onion dip for breakfast. I caved on the cupcake, but I have to draw the line somewhere. #
- Scored free tickets to the preview of Trust with Zach Braff! Hopefully I'll get a chance to motor boat him. #
- How am I supposed to get anything done when someone makes the mistake of giving me the password for their google calendar? #
- If PMS demands a cupcake and you feed it kale…well let's just say this isn't going well. #
- Let the bachelorette shenanigans begin! First stop? Private pole dancing classes. I'm gonna break a limb. http://twitpic.com/2e468j #
- Do you think arnica works on stripper pole burn? #
- Thinking about jumping on a stripper pole tonight? Read my cautionary tale first. http://wp.me/pueVq-1ky #
- You fell victim to one of the classic blunders. The most famous is never get involved in a land war in Asia. #
You are lucky… PMS never lets me draw a line. Just watches and laughs as I eat my way to the fat ass finish line!
But only slightly less well-known is this: “Never go against a Sicilian when death is on the line”! Hahahahahahah-
Anybody want a peanut?
I once tried to slip steamed brocoli past PMS when it was demanding Mexican food. In retaliation it stopped my period at the gate, causing a pregnancy scare and thus a stress-induced face-plant into a vat of refried beans. PMS is a tricky bitch.
Damnit. Now I want nachos. Stat.
Dear Elly Lou,
Potato chips, chocolate, peanut butter, cookies.
Fuck you, bitch,
Ah yes, so you’ve met her, too. Does she help with grad school?
I always feed my PMS kale and then in response my PMS bitch slaps me and force feeds me nachos, ice cream and wine. PMS has zero sense of humor.
Agreed! Also? She has horrible taste in shoes.
Comments are closed.