This Week's Tweets - Elly Lonon

Just stood by while Dad explained to the optician that "The best thing for cleaning eyeglasses is white cotton underpants." #
Virginia bound. It's about time this kid found out about ranch dressing and sweet tea. #
Must be all those years living in Manhattan, but I get a bit agoraphobic when I can't reach the toilet and sink from inside the shower. #
Feels like the audiences from the presidential candidate debates (and maybe the candidates, too) have started a fight club in my colon. #
Well it took 3 1/2 months of diligently setting a good example, but Dad just used the word "boob" as a verb. I'm so proud. #
Dad to Paul: "Think of your diaper as truth – you must ration it." #
Three good things… http://t.co/ANmWNxqH #
Drew – "I basically stopped looking after I found the menage a trois." Drinking with this family is dicey. #

This Week’s Tweets