In Your Face

Me:  Where’s your tiny little hair trimmer thingy?

Rocco:  In the medicine cabinet.  On the right.

Me:  I’m going stick it in my nose, does that gross you out?

Rocco:  Nope.  It’s been in my ass.  Does that gross you out?

I have no idea why Rocco’s been sticking ear and nose hair trimmers in his ass, but I decided to respect his privacy and not inquire further.

Regardless, I and my freshly trimmed nose hair are on the road again.  I’ll try and post while I’m traveling, but this gal is dragging.  Seriously, last night the combination of my short temper and frazzled brain resulted in me saying to Matt, “I’m going to kill you in the face.”  Because obviously anything you could possibly do to someone is extra mean if you do it to their face.  That’s why we slap and punch people in the face, right?

And now I just want to do all kinds of things to people’s faces (that’s what she said).  I can’t stop adding it to the end of every sentence.  “I’ll give you a call tomorrow in the face” or “Can you pick up some milk in the face?”  You know what’s going to happen, right?  Tomorrow morning as people start arriving for my event I’m going to be all, “Hi, I’m Elly!  Thanks for coming today!  Can I have your last name so I can register you in the face?”

So yeah, the brain is firing on all cylinders…in the face.  If I’m lucky, I’ll be able to talk my brothers into guest posting.

In other news, I got my hair cut again so I could be a part of this new music video (thanks, Jess!):


    1. Why yes! I’m a founding member, except for the lesbian part. I don’t think there’s a breeders that look like bieber site yet. Breebers? And now my head hurts. In the face.

  1. We always, ALWAYS end our threats with “in the FACE”!!!

    It just makes everything sound so much more hardcore.

  2. I’m going to use it in a sentence tonight. At work.

    I’ll let you know how it goes in your face.

    I was just going to post about trimming my nose hair and other things I have to do now that I’m old. It’s OK, though. It’s not as bad as the time Steam Me Up, Kid beat me to the post about boob hair and made it 20 times funnier than I would have.

    She took pictures of boob hair. In your face. Hm. I’ll work on that.

  3. Just for you I’m going to use “in your face” in every conversation today.

    One question: does hair grow IN your arse? That’s one hairy arsehole. I’m going to google that one. Yep solving life’s big questions today.

  4. Did you really stick it up your nose after knowing it had been in Rocco’s ass? I’m kind of grossed out by that. I’m so totally going to start saying “in your face” after everything because I’m immature and think it’s hilarious. And the “ur mom” jokes are finally starting to get old so we need a new “thing”. Thanks for that.

    Have fun on your travels.

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