Lonely Little Uke

Once upon a time, my dad was a quiet, unassuming man.  Then he started drinking wine straight from the bottle.  And socializing with neighbors.  Then he retired and started talking to total strangers.  And now we can’t get him to shut up.

So um, the random talking at the end?  Once upon a time Thom said he wanted to be aluminum siding when he grew up.  Which pretty much proves I’m the normal one in the family, right?

Also?  I need a haircut.  Desperately.  And I kind of want to grow a beard now.

Somebody drink a beer for me, k?


    1. …and lord knows someone that makes sock puppet zombies would never, ever, EVER want to have the word “creepy” used to describe them. Ahem.

  1. Haha, aw look at you two lonely little petunias! I kept envisioning your dad dressed in a tweed suit being all professorial in front of a class of students and holding a blackboard pointer, while singing that song to them. Which made me laugh and laugh. I kind of see where you got your crazy from now. Your dad ROCKS HARD! 🙂

    1. His name is Bob. And he has a shirt that says:

      The myth. The man. The Legend

      It’s brilliant. And makes me laugh hard enough to shoot chicken biscuits out my nose.

  2. I think I have a mancrush on your dad… What can I say? Cheers to you, I’ll have one for the two of you today, seeing as it’s my B-day and all. An extra happy MFBT!

  3. A. Dor. Able. (And I hate when people do that with periods because it’s getting old, but it just had to be done here).
    By the way, I would have freaked out if my anesthesiologist confessed he wanted to be an onion farmer just as he’s sticking a needle into my back. You know how docs like to make conversation…
    Oh, and Happy Birthday, Eman!

  4. No petunia I know would stand for an onion patch… and vice verse. This reminds me of Faulty Towers AND about how my Grandma used to laugh in hysterics at Car Talk… At the same time.

  5. tell your dad he can mosey on up to my franzia tap and tell stories all night long.

    also, it just occurred to me, seeing how you are already radiant and showing (happy chills), that ukey friday means we’re going to watch you grow and change every week throughout this pregnancy. booyah interwebz!!!

    1. I think that’s just too many chicken biscuit (grease and bloat) because I swear I haven’t gained any weight yet. I suppose it could be F.T.’s forcefield. Oy vey.

  6. Don’t blame the neighhbors, we still use wine glasses, and have never launched them at our neighbors head with perfect aim…..

    1. I’m still slogging through the stuff from when I was out of town. But now I have something to look forward to…which always makes slogging better.

  7. I can’t wait until we can add drunk babies to this mix.
    Sorry, I’ve already plunged head first into the bottle on this fine friday.
    Even had an extra drink in honor of you!
    Your dad, as always, is awesome…

  8. This was so great. I particularly appreciated your facial expressions when your Dad was speaking. He totally makes you feel 13 again.

      1. Grammar is for pussies. At least it will be for mine. Because obviously its going to need a change of professions after its split into 917 pieces in 7 months.

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