It can’t be snowing again. It just can’t. I refuse to accept that this is happening.
I pick a new reality. I’m actually on a beach somewhere in Mexico sipping on a margarita that Javier Bardem just brought over on a gilded tray. Also? I look just like Penelope Cruz. And Rod Stewart is retired. And I can suddenly spell the word restaurant (WITHOUT spell check). And nothing anywhere in the world is breaking or exploding or radioactive.
*clicks ruby slippers three times, opens right eye, still sees snow and rain*
This calls for desperate measures, people. I hate to whip out my big guns this early in the week, but I don’t think we have a choice.
Yes….it’s time for….A BABY PYGMY GOAT STAMPEDE!
You’re welcome. We’ll get through this Monday yet…