Well THAT went well.
Who knew that I actually DID have an April Fool’s trick up my sleeve? Granted, it wasn’t really intentional but I think it still counts. Yesterday evening, if you thought you might saunter over here to my little BugginWorld and catch up on the latest in vagina news, you were in for a wee surprise. Instead of ladybugs and grammatical errors, my url served up a giant fiery ball of death. Website go BOOM.
My site had been acting funny all morning. I’d already planned on moving it to a new host over the weekend. I’d had at least three different forms of caffeine and a decidedly intense session with my shrink so I said to myself, “Self? Fuck it! Let’s just move that bitch right now. What’s the worst that could happen?”
I really need to stop underestimating my ability to break shit.
As soon as I made the decision, Phillip’s (that’s the new mac’s official name, by the way) drive failed and my router crashed. Did I heed the warning? No. Hells no. I just rebooted everything and rolled up my sleeves.
Dumb. Ass.
I tried to warn everyone of the coming Apocalypse (the bad kind, not my future unicorn). I posted on Twitter, “Beware Interwebz – I’m about to try and do technical stuff which pretty much ensures the entire Internet will explode in a ball of flame.”
Only RySal fully realized the scope of what might happen and responded with, “Wait, let me logoff.” She really is incredibly wise. I wish she had said, “Hey Elly, is that really a good idea? You remember how bad you are with computer stuff, right? Are you sure you want to single handedly undo all of Al Gore’s hard work? Maybe you should try something more manageable – like learning how to rebuild a carburetor with a manual written in Swahili while breathing through lime jello.”
Sigh.
Next time I fuss about trouble I’m having with my server and making noises like maybe I should try and move my site? One of you bitches better tell me to shut the fuck up and slowly back away from the PHPMyAdmin. Seriously. You have my permission to slap me silly and knock some sense back into my thick skull. You should probably buy me a drink afterward, though. It would be the nice thing to do.
I’m thinking about taking away my own administrative privileges.
I think even the lovely tech people in India, after spending most of the past 24 hours listening to me scream/weep/giggle awkwardly, have a new appreciation for the rest of their clients. Then again, their other clients probably don’t suggest they end each phone call by saying “please come again.”
I know. I’m a horrid person. I suppose I shouldn’t mention that I may or may not have begged one guy to say, “Wouldn’t you like to be a Pepper, too?” I was on the phone a LONG time.
So now I THINK everything is working again – with the exception of my exhausted and leaking brain. Do me a solid though? If you see anything blatantly broken or find any posts praising Rod Stewart or Sarah Palin, can you drop me a line and tell me it’s still broken? Pretty please? Feel free to add a “what the hell were you thinking?” line so I can save those emails to review next time I think about undertaking anything technical on my own.
Enough bitching. It’s Friday and there should be giggling. Debra over at She Who Seeks sent me this comic that I of course HAVE to share.
I hear ya, muffin! Remember about a month ago when I said I was switchin’ to WordPress?? Hee hee hee hee…. Yeah.
yeah i tried to research weird porn this week so i could make a funny comment on toy with me’s blog. BAM! got nailed with a trojan. and it wasn’t ribbed for my fucking pleasure.
but i’m impressed you’re able to do all this admin stuff. i’m illiterate. like sarah palin.
Too bad she (and her offspring) don’t use Trojans.
yay, it works!
Great cartoon too.
.-= pixielation´s last blog ..new life, dirty sheets and old pizza crusts =-.
I sacrificed a chicken and danced the mashed potato.
laaalaallallallla *slur* squish mush slaaasllllalaaallalal.
ohh yeah! Wanna cigarette now?
.-= A Vapid Blonde´s last blog ..Birthdays, Clown Porn & Wine Funnels =-.
That should have been *slurp* I always fuck up my own jokes.
.-= A Vapid Blonde´s last blog ..Birthdays, Clown Porn & Wine Funnels =-.
HAAAAAA!! Not..at your admin antics…the cartoon!!!
I didn’t think there was anytime to react otherwise. And although I’m not going to fully reenact my instant logoff, unplug and down the dumbwaiter to the bombshelter routine (which I can do with my eyes closed, btw) I was happy to find the interweb intact when I resurfaced 22 hours later. Warnings are good.
.-= Ry Sal´s last blog ..Nana Inspired #3 – She’s Getting Married =-.
You do those moves while wearing skin tight leather and a string of pearls, don’t you?
Thank god that shit is over.
Rod Stewart did this you know. He took aim with a similar revenge plot on the almighty Sting in retaliation for writing Peanuts (on Outlandos d’Amor)about his exploits.
Sting still hasn’t recovered.
.-= Kelly´s last blog ..Pre Cana Insane =-.
I still can’t talk about “All For One.” In fact, I have to go weep for a few hours. Oh the humanity!
mmmm, green jello…..I mean – I totally destroy computers. My husband says I have this electrostatic halo of doom that just fries anything I touch. It works on cell phones, household appliances and cars too.
.-= Aunt Juicebox´s last blog ..Uh? =-.
You probably shouldn’t put lime jello in computers. Then again, maybe they NEED that shit and that’s why mine keep breaking.
I spent most of yesterday in tears because I couldn’t comment on your post… well some of it anyway. I’m glad you’re back but PLEASE STOP TRYING TO DO TECHNICAL SHIT.
.-= Eternally Distracted´s last blog ..Living with OCD, Mec and Max =-.
I bet someone stepped on a bag of cheetos and they exploded orange powder all over your pristine white floor. THAT’s why you were crying.
Shall we pool our collective change jars and buy our own tech guy? I, too, am technically useless. I still have a shit ton of things I need to do to my new wordpress site, ummm, like add my BlogRoll, which is pretty damned important. I think I am just going to give admin priveledges to everyone one in the Glitter Gang, ummmm, no offense, but, except you. *forgive me vagine face*
.-= Wicked Shawn´s last blog ..In Case Of Emergency =-.
I’ll tend the bar, k? I know my strong suit.
Wow, it sucks that you had so much trouble but I’m glad you got it all worked out. I also enjoyed yesterday’s Rod Stewart Rocks Me All Night Long post that you had up for a limited time. The pictures looked like they were taken by a third party and the post was all written in the third person. Weird, but very interesting.
Since it was taken off your site a few hours later, I was glad to have printed and disbursed a couple hundred copies in time. Whew.
.-= KeepingYouAwake´s last blog ..I Didn’t Order this Porn =-.
This would be an awkward time to ask if your shrink is hot. Right?
😉
.-= marymac´s last blog ..Squirrel Wars Part Two: The Nutty Squeakuel =-.