Ear Worm of DOOM

I’m a wee bit punchy these days – but not so punchy that I think anyone would really notice.  I mean, every girl occasionally bursts into tears when their drugstore is out of milk or laughs maniacally when the cashier asks, “How are you today?”

Yesterday, I gave myself a five minute break to read my email and came upon this:

I watched the video in the background while I browsed my email – only half paying attention.  Admittedly I’d occasionally giggle, particularly at the high-pitched woos.  Then I closed the window and wiped it from my mind.  At least I thought I did.

Half an hour later, sitting in an empty waiting room I found myself humming the catchy tune (all two notes).  Walking home in the bright sunshine I caught myself adjusting my pace to match the beat of the song blaring in my head.  As I held my cellphone to my ear waiting patiently for my call to be redirected to the “next available customer representative,” I noticed my other hand tapping out the beat.  Turns out, it’s pretty hard to explain why you’re chanting “I got big booty bitches,” when someone finally takes your call.

Now I can’t stop singing it.  My standard answer to every question I’m asked is, “Skinny bitches get out.”  But of course I have to repeat it three times in a row and throw in an occasional, “WOO!”  That leads to quite a bit of confusion while I’m negotiating contracts.

Him: “I’m sure we can make this work with your budget.  Where do you need the food and beverage minimum to be?”

Me:  “Skinny bitches get out.  Skinny bitches get out – woo!”

Him:  “Pardon?”

Me:  “I got big booty bitches!  Sing it with me now!”

I’m not even going to tell you how weird my dreams were last night.  I just don’t have that kind of time and you don’t have that kind of money for therapy.  Suffice it to say there was a whole mess o’ booties involved…and Sir Mix A Lot…and that Becky girl (which I’m pretty sure is this girl in real life).

Today I have to go meet with prospective vendors in person.  I need a new song in my head, STAT.  I hear that “Chocolate Rain” guy has a new song.  Maybe I have time to pound that one into my head before I have to interact with real people.

And for the record?  I really do got big booty bitches.  They’re my favorite.


  1. Oh, Sir Mix A Lot, damn you, sir. Damn you to hell. Before you came along, I was down with the homies. You ruined everything for the Beckys. Things will never be the same.

  2. Bug,
    Oh hellz yeah. Big Booty Bitches goes along with the song.. I like big butts and I cannot lie deny… no idea what the words are, wait I will look it up and sing it to you. Hang on. Got it. Ready?

    I like big butts and I cannot lie, You other brothers can’t deny that when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face. You get sprung wanna pull out your tough…

    Great song to sing, while in class.


  3. One time we were at Golden Corral and a guy was singing a song that I’ve never been able to get out of my mind ever since, simply because he would.not.stop.singing.it!!! It went like this, I’ve got ham on my plate, I’ve got Spam on my plate. I don’t like pork, so give me some steak.

    I have no idea if this is a real song or not.
    .-= Aunt Juicebox´s last blog ..Fuck.Me. =-.

    1. Please tell me you’re in the process of recording that song for our listening pleasure. I’m BEGGING you. I’ll throw in a WOO if you need it.

  4. you’re not kidding! i clicked on that link to go to steam me up kid (fanfuckingtastic site, btw!) and no sooner was i away for 2 minutes then my head started bopping and the words started under my breath. this is the shiznet! big big booty, bitches.

  5. I have avoided reading this post all day because the title TERRIFIED me. Now I’m so glad I clicked. Because somehow I will incorporate this into a lesson plan tomorrow morning.
    .-= Andrea´s last blog .."One Love" =-.

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