Cold Toes, Warm Heart

Normally, I like to push your buttons and see just how much you can take, Interwerbz.  But today…today it’s about giving.  (Holy Mother of Moon Pies that sounds like a line taken straight out of a Lifetime made-for-TV-movie or a really bad seventies porno.  I guess it doesn’t matter since I inevitably end up gagging at the end of both.)

Spoiler alert: I’m not buying any presents this year.  Ok fine, I got Rocco something, but I think that was covered in our vows.  How did they go again?  Something like…do you promise to love, honor, and buy Christmas presents for each other – even if it’s just a pair of $3 boxer shorts because you tossed the pair he blew out with a massive fart accompanied by maniacal laughter on the couch last week?

What?  That’s way better than saying the “obey” thing.

Focus, Elly.  No more late night caffeine for you.  What the hell are we talking about again?

Oh yeah!  Charity!  That’s what we’re doing instead of presents this year.  ‘Cause frankly, other than a pair of gloves, some new underwear, a book deal, and a diamond encrusted ukulele, we don’t really NEED anything this year.  So you’ll find below a quick list of some organizations that warmed my cold, cold heart this year.  (But not my toes.  Those things are about to freeze right off.)  Just in case you want to do a little something extra for the world.  *nudge, nudge*

And for those of you that don’t have any extra this year, for those that don’t have enough, scroll on down and visit Jenny.  She’s full of holiday magic.

Beads of Courage

The mission of this group is so profoundly simple and true it can’t be described as anything other than brilliant.  It’s for kids.  With cancer.  Kids that can’t really elocute what they’re going through.  Each time a kid get a blood transfusion, they get a red bead.  When they get chemo, they get a white bead.  And then they have this physical symbol of what they’ve been through, something they can feel and weigh and see.  And I’m getting all weepy.  You know what?  Here’s a news piece CBS did on the organization.  Prepare to cry.

Environmental Working Group

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I adore this group.  As much as I like hearing people are sending money to cancer research organizations like the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society, LiveStrong, or Stand Up to Cancer (and I really, really do!), I love the idea of preventing cancers even more.  My cancer?  It had no genetic cause.  It was strictly environmental.  So I’m all about an organization that’s fighting to protect me from lead in my lipstick and BPA’s in my tupperware.

GrassRoot Soccer

This organization uses the language of soccer to educate young people about HIV and AIDS, teaches them how to make healthy decisions, avoid risks, and build support networks.  They also improve the lives of those already infected by reducing the stigma of AIDS and the resulting discrimination.  Prevention, people.  I’m all about it.  That’s why I carry around a lighter and a can of hairspray at all times.

Jenny, The Bloggess – High Priestess of Social Media, Zombies, and Polydactyl Kittens

Yesterday Jenny offered Amazon gift cards to the first twenty people that asked for help.  “If you’re struggling for money right now and don’t know how you’ll give your kids presents… just leave me a comment and your email address (always hidden and never used) and I’ll email a $30 Amazon gift card to the first twenty people who leave a comment explaining why it would make a difference in their lives right now.”  So why don’t you saunter on over there and offer to send a gift card, too?  You’re guaranteed it’ll go into the hands of someone awesome because they’re a Jenny fan.  Man I love it when bloggers get all uppity and do good things.

Speaking of which, don’t forget to order your calendar of naked bloggers while there’s still time.


  1. great list, elly! i’m all over them. and thanks for making me cry and crave a moon pie simultaneously. what’s wrong with me? nothing makes me stop thinking about food.

  2. Excellent list! I’m donating in my bosses’s names this year! Impossible to buy for rich people anyway! At least some good will come of it, and of this blog and Jenny’s.

    Thanks Ellykins!

  3. This is an awesome list Elly.

    I really like the idea of the beads.

    Another group that gets love from me this time of year is the battered womens shelters. My daughter and I lived together in one from the time she was 3 weeks old till she was over 6 months old. (My ex husband was abusive and we are both very lucky to be alive.) Even after I left the shelter they had families adopt us and do gifts for us for a couple of years until I got back on my feet and started doing good again. I like to give back to them. They are so amazing. They helped us get safe and stay there.

  4. Oh my goodness. I couldn’t breathe seeing how heavy and long most of the bead necklaces are. The visual impact is just…

    Off to spread the word about Beads of Courage now. Love.

  5. Alright, now listen. I come here to read about vaginas and unicorns and to hear ukelele music. I’m going to hold this loving kindness and spirit of giving against you.

    Ok, not really. You rock, in really big ways.

  6. Amazing list. I’m having a little trouble recovering from watching the CBS segment on Beads of courage but that dust that’s making my eyes water will not prevent me from donating to those amazing causes.

  7. This is why I’m glad I started blogging. I hear so many people around me making excuses for their selfishness that I sometimes feel like there isn’t any hope for mankind. But there are so many bloggers out there doing what they can I feel inspired to keep going. And, yes, I’m doing my part over here in T&T’s local charities.

    1. There still might not be any hope for mankind, just as there’s no hope for me ever remembering how to spell restaurant. But that’s why there are bloggers and spell check, right?

  8. I promise to do good things as soon as the NyQuil fog has lifted and the snot as slithered away.

    For now I want to talk about me. One year I couln’t afford to buy presents but I said I would make Christmas eve dinner for all 10 people and that would be my contribution. Duck confit, seared duck breast, maple balsamic reduction with a host of other yummy things. When my brogrincher asked if I needed any wrapping paper and my response was I didn’t buy presents, did you want me to wrap your duck breast? He looked at me and said “ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?” What a brat.

    Any way…enough about how I am dreading the holiday’s. I have to go blow my nose.

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