My friend Stu has the most beautiful and thick head of hair I’ve ever seen on a person, and he religiously swears off hats.  He wants to be sure his hair and scalp get all the circulation they could possibly need.  If not wearing a head cover gets me a third of Stu’s hair, I’ll never cover it again.  So with the change in weather and my devotion to Stu’s ‘do, I’ve started leaving the house with a naked head.  Of course friends and family tell me it looks great, but I’m still self-conscious.  I’ve still got a little thin patch in the front that needs special attention.  I’d call it a comb-over, but there still really isn’t enough hair to warrant a comb.  It’s more of a pat over – or a spit moistened hand smear over.  Anyway, let’s just say it really has to be arranged perfectly to not look terribly disturbing.

I took my naked head to last week’s Baptism.  Being a major event in a child’s life, the day was well documented.  I held one of the girls for approximately three minutes.  This guaranteed my appearance in well over seven hundred photos.  Somehow these photos ended up everywhere – forwarded with emails, posted on Facebook, plastered on the billboard over the Lincoln Tunnel.  Boy did I receive a LOT of comments about the hair.

My favorite was from my mom.  “Honey, it looks like a really expensive hair style.”

“Mom, it WAS a RIDICULOUSLY expensive hair style.”  I’m not sure that it’s a price worth paying for much other than not dying.  If you’re planning a spa retreat in the near future, avoid any place that has a “Chemo-stry Full Body Hair Removal” treatment.  Stick with the seaweed wrap.  Trust me.

So rather than the cancer ‘do or the chemo-coiffure I’d like to share some of the other nicknames people have suggested for the current hair style:

Beggars can’t be choosers.  Hell – I’d be happy with the Nancy Regan if it just meant a little more hair!  Though Dottie does have me thinking about picking up some visors and learning how to putt…