I’m mildly obsessed with Neil Patrick Harris. The term “mildly obsessed” in that previous sentence could also be replaced with “consumed by an intense need to host a slumber party where he and I stay up all night giggling and singing show tunes after which I will chain him up in my basement where I will feed him peeled grapes and curry paste so that I can force him to do his Barney Stinson any time I need a little pick-me-up.” I really like me some NPH.
Sometimes I wish I had another gay brother just so NPH could marry into the family.
I also have a special place in my evil body-snatching heart for Jason Segel. He’s funny, freakishly tall, and infatuated with muppets – remind you of anyone else you know? (No, the answer is not Tim Robbins. Sheesh.) I would play that breakup scene from Forgetting Sarah Marshall on endless loop if I could find time in my busy Twilight watching schedule.
All that talk of Forgetting Sarah Marshall has me craving Russell Brand for lunch. Damn you, Katy Perry. Fortunately for all of us, Russell if off topic. Plus my basement dungeon really only has room for NPH. Plus I don’t have a basement. Sigh.
Last night I got a call from the little brother.
I was nervous to answer as I had just read the flurry of comments on my Facebook post announcing his colon irrigation. I assumed he was not amused. Fortunately residual anesthesia and brown liquor put him in the mood for watching YouTube videos rather than social networking. I was saved.
Thom: “Are you near your computer?”
Me: “I could be. Why?”
Thom: “I have to show you something.”
Me: “Does it involve Facebook?”
Thom: “No. It’s on YouTube. Wait, why do you ask?”
Me: “No reason. I’m ready.”
Thom: “Search How I Met Your Mother and Confrontation.”
Me: “I’m intrigued.”
Thom: “You’re welcome. I figured this video would cement Rocco in third place of the men in your life list…assuming we don’t count fictional vampires.”
Me: “It’s…absolutely beautiful.”
Thom: “What the hell is this?”
Me: “What?”
Thom: “You’ve got Magillicutty pimping your blog, too?”
Me: “That tramp has got to earn her keep. Say, why don’t you look at YouTube some more?”
Thom: “Seriously? Next item: call and check on my brother’s colon?”
Me: *click*
And Interwebz? It was all that I dreamed it would be and more. I must share it now. I must also share that Thom has not fully regained control of his bowel. I find both of these things incredibly amusing. You’re welcome.
I am way behind the times, I guess… The first thing I thought of when I clicked play was “Hey!!! That’s Doogie! All grown up. That’s neat.”
I also enjoyed the comment “Are you near your computer?” That’s a tricky question. If I am, I am hesitant to say I am so I don’t sound like I sit in front of the computer all day. if I’m not I’ll run through the house to do it right away.
.-= KeepingYouAwake´s last blog ..I Wish I Was a Bear =-.
Dude. 700 square feet. I am ALWAYS near my computer.
If you don’t know all the joy that Doogie has become, stop EVERYTHING and go watch Dr. Horrible’s Sing Along Blog. NOW. I just changed your life. You’re welcome.
I am mildly obsessed with a celebrity that I cannot even cop to. THAT’S how shameful it is. At least NPH is awesome.
.-= Aunt Becky´s last blog ..Nothing Says “I Love You†Like A Grown Man In A Helmet =-.
It’s John Tesh, isn’t it?
Holy hell that was funny. And…. fuck twilight. I have lost all respect for you.
What the hell the comment luv wasn’t working. You did that on purpose. I am watching you…
.-= mepsipax´s last blog ..Weak ass Wednesday =-.
Mmmhmm. ‘Cause I’m sure before this post you were all, “I really respect that Elly – that’s a girl to be recognized and admired.” ‘Cause that’s EXACTLY how you roll…
You see why I had to revoke your Comment Luv privileges.
OutFRICKINstanding! To use the vernacular.
Or would that be vagnacular around here?
I have to dry hump you now. Vagnacular. I feel a submission to urban dictionary coming on.
NPH was funnier than shit in Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay. I have a whole new respect for him after seeing him in that!
.-= Andrea´s last blog .."Big balls" =-.
I totally want to be a gay man just so I can shag him. But while a gay man, I’d probably tap Adam Lambert, too…just for good measure.
That’s a beautiful moment……..roflmao……seriously…..it is so illegal the things I want to do to that werewolf boy from New Moon, holy hell!!!! He would never be the same again. My completely not secret Hollywood crush is Dennis Leary…so angry, foul mouthed, hotttttt!! I like it!! Of course, I would want him to leave immediately after I was finished with him. LOL I would want to hang out with Richard Gere and I have a serious girl crush on Meryl Streep, of all things, she is so awesome, I totally vibe on her ability to do anything she wants.
.-= Wicked Shawn´s last blog ..Wickedly Confused……… =-.
That is such a strange medley of boys, dirty old men, and non-traditional girl crushes! I think you broke my brain. If you like foul mouthed, stick around here a little while. 🙂
Oh I wish I had a gay brother. My brother is straight and knocked up a trashy whore bimbo thing. Twice. But that’s okay, he’s still a great brother. A girl can dream though.
And if you ever have Neil Patrick Harris over for a sleepover I better get an invitation. I’ll bring the booze.
.-= Amanda@BrilliantSulk´s last blog ..Fancy a Walk? =-.
See that’s where you messed up. My brothers all “think” they are straight. I just need to get NPH in a wig and hot pants to woo my brothers. And let’s be honest. It shouldn’t be too hard to get NPH in a wig and hot pants.
Elly, As much as I enjoy NPH, I cannot endure that goddam show for even a minute. I also adore Sarah Marshall guy but the script blows so badly…it is impossibly lame. hmmmm….must reconsider. because if you, elly, like it…well, then i should like it too.
Even when bedrested for a million years and unable to sleep with NO cable tv, I would not,could not watch it.
love brilliant sulk’s comment and must go see her now. thanks elly. you are the best hookup…ever
and that is how you keep ’em comin back for more.
.-= magda´s last blog ..It is all a big LIE =-.
I don’t know what to tell you. It’s like crack to me. Then again I watch Twilight like four times a week. I may not be the best judge.
I love Jason Segal. That naked breakup scene made me sigh, all “Ah man, I’m never gonna find a guy who slaps his penis around like that.” *plops chin in hand*
…or writes musicals about vampires. *sigh*
If Barney Stinson was around to look up to when I was a kid, my whole life could have been different.
Instead I had Mr. Brady and ALL THESE STUPID KIDS ARE DRIVING ME APESHIT OMG OMG OMG!!
Sorry.
Bitter.
.-= moooooog35´s last blog ..Digging my Grave with an Epic Mullet =-.
I don’t think you could have pulled off a Barney with that mad feathered hair of yours.
I love How I Met Your Mother. However, I have a hard time being infatuated with any of the characters. Once they showed a close up of Jason Segel eating cookies, and I’m too OCD for that shit. It grossed me the fuck out and I never looked at him the same. I would like to see Barney work on a car or change some oil. Any man who has softer hands than me gets -10 points right off the top. I’m sure they’ll each be devastated to learn that I’m not interested.
.-= Jaime´s last blog ..people are assholes… =-.
So just to be clear here: cooking eating = bad, penis slapping = fine. I have to think about that one a minute.
That’s cool. It leaves all the more for me. [Insert maniacal laughter here.]
You have an obsession with NPH. That makes me want to confess that I used to love the fat guy from King of Queens.
Screw Twilight, watch True Blood.
.-= Hellachella´s last blog ..Today is the DaaAAaaaaY =-.
I can’t handle that Anna chick and her bad southern accent. It hurts me.
…but I totally get the chunky dude from King of Queens thing.
I like that she has huge gappy teeth. Think of the remarkable fangs she’ll have one day!
.-= Hellachella´s last blog ..Today is the DaaAAaaaaY =-.
I want some brothers that will call me up and tell me shit that I can find on YouTube too. It is just less disturbing that your siblings do it than your parents…
.-= submom´s last blog ..WTF Wednesday: Eye? Aye! =-.
Mom thinks YouTube is Bono’s band.
I knew this clip existed, but didn’t know that we shared an obsession with the young Dr. Horrible.
FWIW, I have a basement. Just saying.
.-= Falling´s last blog ..In Which I Manage to Sneak a Karate Kid Reference in the Middle of a Parenting Philosophy Discussion =-.