Last night I dreamt this kid came out weighing 50 lbs. I blame Thom for sending me this video.
Fortunately, I also dreamt I was a professional ice skater, so I’m going to hope this isn’t some sort of premonition.
Yesterday some lady at the mall I’ve never seen in my life started rubbing my belly while telling me he’s way too high to come out anytime soon. Mom’s response? “I thought you’d been exaggerating.”
Me? Exaggerate? Have you ever heard of anything so ridiculous?
Anyway, I’m having trouble focusing BECA– USE THIS KID IS GAINING A POUND A WEEK AND I’M HAVING A HARD TIME WRITING A EULOGY FOR MY VAGINA so, instead, here’s a supportive email I received from my friend Don:
No one yet. Just wanted to Paul your leg.