All About That Bass (and Phlegm)

Less than a month into preschool and my kid is already bringing home the plague. So bear with my trepidation at the high notes. I’d tell you to bear with me on the actually hitting of the high notes, but you’ve probably been here before so there’s no sense pretending.

Speaking of bearing – that word drives me nuts. Homonyms drive me nuts in general, but bare and bear make my head spin. I can’t bear them. See? That doesn’t look right. Im more likely to run buck naked through a field of blackberry bushes than to use the right word in that previous sentence, so doesn’t that make bare the obvious choice?

Don’t even get me started on reign, rein, and rain. Yeesh.

The only time I’m sure in either situation is when it’s in reference to Prince. Always rain. Always bare.

Unless there’s a bear skin rug involved.

This is hopeless. So I’m running away to swim in more cold meds and snot rags. But first, I leave you with today’s Mother Fucking Booze Time soundtrack of Meghan Trainor’s All About That Bass. On a uke. Which? Isn’t that exciting because Meghan herself rocks a ukulele. Hard. But this is what you’re getting today anyway. So suck it.

Why yes, I DO get cranky when I’m sick. Why do you ask?


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