I Can’t Even Pretend This Is About Anything

Have you ever suddenly had seventeen projects suddenly hit crunch time simultaneously?  Have you ever thought, “Gee I didn’t plan the timing of these things well at all?”  Have you ever had so many questions that all really mean the same thing squishing about in your brain that you couldn’t separate them enough to list a third question that made sense because you really like to do things in threes (well, except THAT – pervs) so you really wanted three questions because symmetry is overrated and three things can’t be symmetrical so three IS the magic number, yes it is?

And then after you write a really long question that isn’t terribly coherent just for the sake of having a third question, you come up with a whole other question that would have worked better but you forget what it was before you get it written because you go off on another random faux-question diatribe?

And then you remember it again but now a question alluding to the copious volumes of caffeine you’ve consumed this morning to cope with your suddenly quadrupled “to do” list seems like a bit of a letdown after all this buildup so you decide just to skip it?

*finishes fourth cup of tea and takes another bite of brownie*

Oh say!  Have I told you about this music video that I can’t stop watching?  It has kittens, glitter, and a chunky dude in a gold lame vest.  And there’s fish with teeth.  And more glitter.  The only thing missing is me face humping Justin Timberlake.

Not that there’s a video of that anywhere.  Yet.

*scribbles new item on “to do” list and goes to turn on kettle*


  1. Did you know that Har Mar Superstar is from here, and that he named himself after a small suburban Minneapolis mall, where there is a pet store that looks remarkably like the one in the video and the only Barnes & Noble around with a used book section?

  2. WHAT??? I can’t hear you over this croisandwhich with disgusting sprouts on it.

    Again, I have to watch the video at home. Boo Hiss. If I make it home tonight, in the dark, on the road, with the snow.

  3. I had to stop listening to that song when he said “come and be my mommy.”

    Have you ever not been able to find the time/will to grocery shop, even though you’re existing on bread, eggs and yogurt? I’m exaggerating…I also have 2 pears and some old cheese.

    1. Oh but that’s before all the dancing starts! You’re missing out! Also I’m going to try and convince my little brother to be Har Mar for Halloween this year.

  4. I love how he rocked that ourfit and I love his bootcut jeans! I cannot believe you left out NPH in your wishfulfillment dream. *sobs*

  5. I have pondered your riddle, oh over-caffeinated one. I was almost fooled into giving a wrong answer but I realize you put the answer right in one of the questions. The answer is 13, right? Very tricky of you.

    I think that video is now my new favorite distraction.

  6. Three IS the magic number.
    Me, Myself and I.
    Stewart, Sting, Andy.
    Fire, Water, earth.
    And in homage to Sister Scholastica big guy, son, and the super bitchin’ white dove!

  7. 1. The Pudgy Horror Picture Show.
    2. How many birds were harmed in the making of this video?
    3. I’m pretty sure Andy Sandberg had something to do with this.

  8. I’d give my left foot for 17 things to do…. I can feel my blood pressure rising to that unhealthy level just thinking about it… Feels like home.

    PS please send brownies.

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