I Have “These Dreams” on Continuous Loop in My Head

I woke up this morning violently angry at my mother-in-law.  Why?  Well, because in my dream last night we were shopping at a colossal Costco (think Idiocracy) and she went to pick up an empty Christmas tin from a massive, shoulder-high cardboard box full of empty Christmas tins.  I told […]

Bloggers Get Naked

“Don’t call me Shirley.” And that’s just about all the sadness I can take today.  Let’s move on to happy, joyful things, shall we?  Like…oh I dunno…how about barnacle schlongs? While the Tuberous Bushcricket may have the biggest balls relative to body weight in the animal kingdom, the barnacle comes […]

Batteries Not Included

Have you ever noticed that cold meds make everything seem like a good idea?  Me either.  Mom, don’t read any further. My bedroom is too small for bedside tables.  We managed to squeeze in a queen size bed and a dresser.  The end.  So I don’t have a little “magic […]

What I’m Pretty Sure Was a Hallucination

It turns out that it’s almost as exhausting to attend a conference as it is to plan one – though both are probably equally hard on the liver. I’m still a little overwhelmed.  My desk is covered with a stack of random fliers, five different coffee mugs, a sparkly stuffed […]