Driving Conversations

Thom:  I had a revelation the other day.

Me:  With Jesus and everything?

Thom:  Yup.

Me:  Bring it.

Thom:  Tom Brokaw is the same age as Mom.

Me:  For reals?

Thom:  He was being interviewed and said he was almost 70.

Me:  And how did that get you to Jesus.

Thom:  He was 33 when he died and 33 is a multiple of 3 as is 69.

Rocco:  That was some pretty impressive bullshit for making it up on the spot.


Rocco:  Peg said your dad is real excited about this weekend.

Thom:  What, has he been nipping?

Me:  Yes Thom, all day.  Can’t you hear the conversation now?  “Goddman Peg, my nipples have been hard all day.  I guess I’m real excited to see the kids.”

Thom:  “I’m chafing!”


Rocco:  How long is this one?

Me:  Google maps says we’re not even in the traffic yet.  It doesn’t go all red and black for a couple miles.

Thom:  We’re in pre-traffic – the milky white discharge that happens before you hit the traffic.


Thom:  So my buddy has a new pick up line he’s threatening to try.

Me:  This cannot end well.

Rocco:  Well what is it?

Thom:  “Excuse me, does this rag smell like chloroform?”


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12 thoughts on “Driving Conversations

  1. Oh fucking hell… I loved it.. Especially the new pickup line…. epic. The nipple chaffing was good too…Not that nipple chaffing is good. See, this is why I don’t talk much.
    .-= mepsipax´s last blog ..Ifuck =-.

  2. For the purposes of enjoying this even more, I’m pretending that these conversations are not happening in the privacy of a single car, but perhaps on a cross-country bus. In front of some Republicans.

    (I almost wrote nuns, but thought Republicans was funnier…agreed?)
    .-= Falling´s last blog ..If Only Jack Had Invoked This Rule =-.

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